I must jump like a frog from every couch or moving thing. I must ascend the tallest trees, towers, rocks with no help because I am the strongest. I have a compulsion to leap before looking from the highest heights; swing from anything that challenges me; touch as MANY things as my very small hands can manage and even lick them just to make sure they taste the way they appear.
Oh, by the way, when it looks like I’m doing this to you…
I really feel like I’m doing this…
It’s a hard balance as a mother. We want our children to be safe from all harm, stay our babies forever and never experience hurt, grief or fear. But, ironically, in conjunction with that, we want them to be strong and independent dreamers. We want them to aim for the mountain tops and let nothing stand in their way (Isaiah 41:10.)
I am one, and always have been, to see where a child takes one wobbly step and I, in turn (in my head), see them ten steps later rolling down the remainder of the steps. I have a natural knack for seeing a bleak outcome in these scenarios. It didn’t bother me before when it was with other people’s children because then I was just being “extra” cautious. It was almost laughable. But now, I have my own child for whom I am 100% responsible in every way. And I need to be so much more sensitive in the ways I am fostering her growth. My ways of watching for danger at every step and turn give almost a timid spirit to my very bold and independent child. I am learning there is a difference in teaching your child to be cautious, but to also enjoy the adventure of life all around them.
When my husband and I became parents, it gave me a whole new thankfulness as to God’s plan in joining us together. My husband is my complete opposite. He has taught me how to help push our child to the limits and brink of what she thinks is possible. Sometimes as a mother I get nervous because I think, that is too high or that is too far. But, the confidence, boldness and independence I see burst through our child is not to be underestimated. Some of that comes naturally, yes (and oh man does some of that independence come naturally haha,) but some of that has been planted and nurtured in her soul by a loving, earnest father.
Something my husband brought up the other day, that is very hard for me as a mother to think about is, one day our child will grow up and not need us anymore. We should desire that our children grow to be independent thinkers, bold dreamers and strong enough to stand up for their own beliefs. As much as I want my child to stay my little baby forever and protect her from every heartache, bump/bruise, fear, etc.- it is necessary. They are testing the limits of their small world and discovering there is much more out there. It is so scary for us as parents. We were designed to want to shield them…insert momma bear instincts! But, sometimes we just need to take a breath, momma, and let them fully experience. Let them dream, leap, climb, test the boundary a little and slowly watch their spirits unfold.